Globalisation???

Question: What is the height of globalization?

Answer: Princess Diana's death

Question: How come?

Answer:

An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was high on Scottish whiskey, followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles,treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines! And this is written by a Malaysian, using Bill Gates' technology which he stole from the Japanese. And you are probably reading this on one of the IBM clones that use Taiwanese-made chips, and Korean made monitors, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by lorries driven by Indians, hijacked by Indonesians and finally sold to you by Chinamen!

That's GLOBALISATION lah!

Joker of the Day - Edmund Yap

By right this morning I was supposed to write something about chicken but then I noticed this donkey, hence today I decided to devote this section just for him...







Please read what he first wrote...





Then within 30 minutes, he chickened out liao...

Such a lovely guy, who's in a super-deepshit desperado situation seeking public attention, came into the group and dropped such a silly comment thus stirred up all petty arguments!

However he was smart to chicken out fast enough, which is what the typical coward did... or else he'll kena more bombards from other FBers...

No second thought... 'Joker of the Day' award goes to this donkey - Edmund Yap :)

My name is Pineapple???

A grand wedding dinner in HK...

wtf what kind of name is this? This is really funny... I have friends with names like Apple Lim (a transvestite) or Orange (purely a nickname) etc, but when comes to this PINEAPPLE it's really cool...

I presume that is the name for the bridegroom as Maggie is very much a feminine name... You look at the bridegroom's face, he looks so f!?#-u% hence Pineapple really suits him best!!!

Blow Job

One night a guy takes his girlfriend home. After kissing each other goodnight at the front door, the guy starts feeling a little horny. With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and, smiling, he says to her: "Honey, would you give me a blow job?"

Horrified,she replies "Are you mad? My parents will see us!"

"Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?"

"No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"

"Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!"

"No way. It's just too risky!"

"Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?"

"No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!"

"Oh yes you can. Please?"

"No, no. I just can't"

"I'm begging you... "

Out of the blue, the light on the stairs goes on, and the girl's sister shows up in her pajamas, hair disheveled, and in a sleepy voice... she says: "Dad says to go ahead and give him a blow job, or I can do it. Or if need be, Mom says she can come down herself and do it. But for God's sake tell him to take his hand off the intercom."

Damn! This one is SO accurate!!!

This is the most accurate test that I've ever tried. It's true, give it a try mate!

Imagine you walked into a small hut by the river in the lost jungle. You pushed open the door. In front of you there were 7 small beds to the right of the hut, and another 7 small chairs surrounding a small round table.

In the middle of the table, there was a round food tray with 5 kinds of fruit in it.
They are:
a. an apple
b. a banana
c. a strawberry
d. a peach
e. an orange

Which fruit will u choose?
Your choice reveals about YOU! For test results: Please SCROLL DOWN










a. if you choose apple: that means you are a person who loves to eat apple;
b. if you choose banana: that means you are a person who loves to eat banana;
c. if you choose strawberry: that means you are a person who loves to eat strawberry;
d. if you choose peach: that means you are a person who loves to eat peach;
e. if you choose orange: that means you are a person who loves to eat orange.

I bet you are hunting for me to aqueeze my neck... but don't you agree with me that this test is good... haha you are so gong gong ones!!! GET BACK TO WORK LAH :)

Ye-e-e-e Ha-a-a-a

An attractive woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Texas when her car broke down.

An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a Ye-e-e-e Ha-a-a-a! so loud that it echoed from the surrounding hills.

When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station, yelled one final Ye-e-e-e Ha-a-a-a! and rode off. What did you do to get that Indian so excited? asked the service-station attendant.

Nothing. I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn't fall off, the woman answered.

Lady, the attendant said, Indians ride bareback.

World War III - a bicycle man repairman!

Bush and Powell were sitting in a bar. A guy walked
in and asked the barman, Isn't that Bush and Powell?

The barman said, Yep, that's them.

So the guy walked over and said, Hello. What are you
guys doing here?

Bush said, We're planning World War III.

The guy asked, Really? What's going to happen then?

Bush said, Well, we're going to kill 10 million Afghans and 1 bicycle repairman.

The guy exclaimed, Why are you gonna kill a bicycle repairman!

Bush turned to Powell and said, See, I told you no one would worry about the 10 million Afghans!

Liong & Linkam

Abdullah Ahmad Badawi goes to a primary school to talk about the Corruption togther with all his tough looking bodyguards. After his talk, he offers question time.

One little boy puts up his hand and Abdullah asked, what is your name?

Liong

And what is your question, Liong?

I have 3 questions.
First, why did Malaysia Prime Minister open ceremony for his relatives Nasi Kandar in Australia?
Second, why many Indians wanted Samy Vellu to step down yet he is still their leader?
Third, why corruption is obvious now in Malaysia but not so before Mahathir stepped down? What is the strategy difference to cover up?

Just then, the bell rings for recess.

Abdullah Ahmad Badawi informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume Abdullah says, Ok where were we? Oh, thats right. Question time. Who has a question?

A different little boy raises his hand.

Abdullah points him out and asked him what is your name?

Linkam

And what is your question Linkam?

I have 5 questions.
First, why did Malaysia Prime Minister open ceremony for his relatives Nasi Kandar in Australia?
Second, why many Indians wanted Samy Velu to stepped down yet he is still their leader?
Third, why corruption is obvious now in Malaysia but not so before Mahathir stepped down? What is the strategy difference to cover up?
Fourth, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early?
Fifth, where is Liong???

Driver's License

Did you know that now you can find anyone's Drivers License on the internet including your own? It's an American database, but apparently it links into Malaysia as well. I just searched for my friend's license, and there it was, picture and all absolutely cool!

This was something I didn't know we could do. I'm not sure whether this info is out there for anyone to access.
Have a look at: http://www.license.shorturl.com/

Wild wild experience...

An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall.

A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, pink, blue, yellow, purple.

The old man just stared.

The young man said, "What's the matter old timer, never done anything wild in your life before?

The old man replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."